Pc: Dreamstime


Hello Ima, greetings to you. My name is (withheld). I want to share my own story too.

There was a girl I asked out years ago. She accepted. I later proposed to her and she accepted to marry me. But her mother told me to put her through the university before we get married.

It was a brilliant idea because I wanted my wife to be educated. I was able to pay her school fees for four years, house rent and everything else she needed.

I was a teacher in a public school, so most of the times, I was barely paid, but I tried as much as I could to support her.

When finally she was done with school, I decided we should get married, but she said she wanted to go for her NYSC program first. I spent a lot of money, getting all the things she needed to sustain herself during the program.

Few weeks after she got to the camp, she started ignoring my calls and snubbing my messages. I thought she was too busy, trying to settle down, so I allowed her for a while.

After a week, I tried reaching out to her again, but she turned off her phone after it rang the first time. Since then, I wasn't able to reach out to her anymore. She blocked my number. She also blocked me on social media.

When I told her mother about it, all the woman could tell me was that I should give her daughter a breathing space.

After a year without hearing from her, I decided to visit her mother. On getting to her house, I saw some cars outside.

I walked into the parlour and saw my fiancée, kneeling beside another man and receiving marriage blessings from her family. It was an indoor traditional marriage.

I was shocked. I developed an instant headache. I blinked back the tears in my eyes and waited outside. When she came out, she wasn't anything close to remorseful.

She told me to leave her house else she was going to embarrass me. Her mother came out too and told me if I didn't leave, she'd call the villagers and tell them I was a thief and they'd burn me to ashes.

I won't forget what my fiancée told me before I left. She said she could never get married to a common teacher like me. A common teacher who was able to send her to school, pay her rent and took care of her needs while she did her program.

Well, whenever I hear the word "women are weaker vessels" I feel like killing whoever utters such statement because some women are very heartless. I was physically and emotionally traumatized for a very long time.

I almost committed suicide, if not for a friend who encouraged me to move on. See, even as women are given attention, we men also need to be given that attention too. We are also human beings, we have feelings. We should be heard too. We also go through shits.

From Ima Udott:
Hello readers, please if you want to comment or make a suggestion, do well to check and cross-check your diction. Any comment that looks insulting or harsh will not be welcomed.

To the men: Please if you're a victim of sexual harassment, heartbroken or traumatized by your opposite sex or even same sex and you have been keeping quiet all these while, now is the time to speak up.

Drop your story on my message box and I won't hesitate posting it for you. You need not fear, your identity will be hidden.

#TheOtherGender
#SpeakUp
#YourFavouriteStoryTeller✍️